Home Sweet Home (for two whole weeks)

Made it back home safe and sound. Souvenirs brought back: A load of cheap Hawaiin t-shirts, one right hemisphere of face visibly swollen to twice it's normal size (a combination of the weather and flying), more steroid-induced side effects (had to taper back on for the trip; tapering back off again starting tomorrow), a possible curse cast upon me by the Coalition of Waikiki Street Vendors (see full story below), a forged friendship with Dryden Mitchell, lead singer of Alien Ant Farm, whose bags were also lost by Northwest Airlines (it's good to know they don't discriminate) coupled with a standing offer to attend a concert as a special guest, and over 350 digital photos (a few of which could do the EMHS Art Department or perhaps even VanderLende/Cloud proud) which will be uploaded to Snapfish.com for everyone's viewing pleasure.

Street Vendor Full Story:...Be on the lookout for a possible curse cast upon Ashli C. Hepler by the Coalition of Waikiki Street Vendors after they refused to return two bathing suits purchased for Corlissa and Keesha despite the fact that the woman had given me her word that, if i put it on my Visa, my money would be refunded immediately if I returned the suits. After I simultaneously named and she refuted every plausible problem I might encounter upon returning the suits (I've been all over the third-world, nice try, folks), I charged them on my Visa. When I went to return them, I was told "No refunds under any circumstances. Who told you this? Only exchange." I asked for the person who sold me the suits. She got on the phone and said she never told me such a thing. (out with being a part of "ohana", in with being called a bold-faced liar). I asked for the manager. No manager until Monday morning9I called Visa. They would suspend the transaction if the company would verify the authorization code on the receipt. I called the number of the company listed on the receipt. Not a working number. So, I proceeded to walk up and down a crowded Seaside Street, stopping every tourist and giving them strict instructions not to make a purhcase from this vendor. I interrupted every sales transaction. A woman and her 4 daughters walked away in the middle of a purachase (I think the nerve damage to my face coupled with the fact that steroids make you drip sweat like a Gatorade commerical coupled with the fact that I've become quite comfortable behaving like a stark-raving lunatic actually came in handy this time) I'm convinced at least 10 major purchases were lost because of me. Crocker was actually embarrassed enough to walk away (if you know her, you know what I mean). Well... the world is a better place. There are now three Hawaiians who know how to use the "return" function on the Visa machine. I will prevail! Who do these people think they are dealing with?

Anyway...I'm back home... Only a few hours before I have to start booking flights, leasing apartments, packing boxes, and preparing to move across the country for the summer. No pressure, huh?

Thanks in advance to everyone who is working behind the scenes to facilitate the move. A huge shout-out to the Lisa Lashbrooke, whose first-hand knowledge of world of air travel saved me and my dog-tired laptop visits to over a hundred different travel-related websites. One for Anna Banana, who has graciously volunteered to communicate with my friends and coordinate my California visitation schedule, To a friend who, even as we speak, is probably fighting with a tape meausre to figure out the dimensions of her basement so that my children will live in thier own one-bedroom, carpeted apartment. Another for Alysia, who is logging in as me and turning my blog in to a veritable Classified Ad, Still another to Steph Reed, who birthed the concept of the benefit and is working her butt of to bring the idea to fruition, To the Carpenter's Tools, who have agreed to play one or two songs as a reunion special at the benefit (I'm pretty sure it took the most convincing to get my dad on board) which summons up some of my fondest childhood memories. To Jeremy & Kristin, who won't even be married for another six weeks, but have already adopted a sick child. To Danna, who sends me an email virtually daily with a new proposal of how she and Bobby can help. To Nancy White, who called just to lend me some support but ended up breathing life into the words of a book I've been reading ("There's No Place Like Hope," by Vickie Girard') given to me by one "Coach Pie" who bought me the book that, less than 20 pages in, has already transformed me (she even offered to sit and read it to me if my eyes got too bad). To amazing co-workers who faithfully read, comment, and encourage despite the fact that they are authentic communicators and a blog can be quite one-sided. This list could go on for days.... To be continued!